(With acknowledgments to Ambrose Bierce and his Devil’s Dictionary)
- America: “When you’re a star they let you do it, you can do anything.”
- Believe me: Subliminal command
- Chaos: The old Razzle-dazzle. Octopus ink for the suckers.
- Democracy: This time it’s personal
- Everybody: Fuck them.
- Fuck: Everybody.
- God: A really terrific guy, one of my earliest supporters.
- Hell: Accountability; see also – listening.
- Investment: Lower-class whites.
- Justice: When I win, see also, when you lose.
- Kinky: No peeing
- Law: Like justice, but it’s now a rule that I win.
- Marriage: Like ventriloquism, but you don’t have to move your hand.
- Nullify: Obama
- Obama: Trump brand Dog whistle. How I got here.
- Putin: Pappa?
- Qualified: Loyal.
- Republicans: Pussies: I grabbed ’em.
- Seizing: Emergency powers.
- Taxes: For chumps, not Trumps.
- Ubermensch: The one word daddy smiled while saying.
- Very: A tiny amount, possibly none.
- Women: A confusing commodity, overvalued; many contain disgusting liquids.
- Xenophobe: The heart of American greatness.
- Yes: Where boredom begins.
- Zigzag: The straightest path between two points.
