Telling the truth about something shameful is a really interesting bargain.
We exchange being a worse person who is seen as better, for being a better person, who is seen as a worse one.
That is, we go from being an immoral person who everybody believes to be moral to a moral person who everybody condemns.
We downgrade our reputation and suffer losses for the deeply soulful result of living in truth once again.
There is something about living a lie that is a bit like holding your breath underwater or going around caked in dirt no one else can see. It’s a pure relief then, finally taking a breath or finally being clean.
The outrage people feel at hearing they were lied to is also interesting. I want to understand specifically what harm was done.
A lie places the victim in a false location. They are lost but they don’t know it.
A lie steals their autonomy and volition. It prevents them from acting in their own interests or self defense.
A lie repudiates the time it seemed but only seemed, we were loved.
A lie reveals our value at the time of sale. Lower than we imagined.
While the lie was believed we didn’t know where we were, or who we were with. Terrifying.